Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Worst Resumes Ever...(Salary.com)


 


  


 


 

So Much for First Impressions...

Resumes and cover letters are often the first things seen by hiring managers and the deciding factors that determine whether or not you get a job interview. Armed with that knowledge, most people spend copious amounts of time crafting them, honing them, and even paying professionals to write it for them.

And then there are those who don’t.

The following examples will likely be difficult to believe, but there really are some people out there who give zero thought to how they come across to potential employers. Their resumes are misspelled, lack any and all semblance of grammar, and often contain wildly inappropriate (yet hilarious) personal information.

Here are seven things you should definitely not do to your resume/cover letter if you ever want to be taken seriously (and to avoid the Internet's Hall of Shame).

Know When to Hold 'Em, When to Fold 'Em

With all due respect to Kenny Rogers, when you’re dealing with resumes it’s best not to morph into The Gambler.

A man known only as “Eric” submitted one of the more epic resumes in recent memory when he hailed himself as someone who would “claw my way to the top using any means necessary…but then be a fair and just ruler.” He also listed “ESP” and “sexy dancing” as employable attributes. Also, under experience he cites “a very fast metabolism” and “enough knowledge to write an essay on pretty much any subject (without researching it).”

Oh Eric…

HIGHer Learning

Ever hear the phrase “too much of a good thing?”

When it comes to this real-life viral resume, upon first glance items such as “intuitive understanding of supply and demand economics,” “ran my own delivery service,” “had a consistent clientele with high customer satisfaction,” and “good with money” all seem like good things.

Except for the fact that all of these skills were garnered as a “Marijuana dealer & nefarious dude.”

Let this be a reminder that you don't have to include every job you've ever had.

A Grave Mistake

It’s a good idea to target specific companies for which you want to work during your job search. You should learn about them, what’s happening with them in the news, what the company’s financial state is, etc. And it’s a great idea to get leads on when internal job openings are being posted.

But this guy took things too far when he tried to dance on someone’s grave.

This overeager jobseeker noticed the Technical Director of a company had died, and then mistook that as a chance to get his foot in the door by applying for the deceased’s job. His cover letter stated “Each time I apply for a job, I get a reply that there’s no vacancy but in this case I have caught you red-handed and you have no excuse because I even attended the funeral to be sure that he was truly dead and buried before applying.”

He then attached a copy of the man’s death certificate along with his resume. Yup. Just let that classiness wash over you for a second.

Caught in a (Nic) Cage

Vanessa Hojda was just trying to be proactive after seeing an ad for a job in her college’s career center. But what happened next was totally unexpected.

Hojda attempted to contact the business to inquire about the job opening, attaching her resume and cover letter to the e-mail. Or so she thought. Instead of her resume, Hojda mistakenly attached a hysterically psychotic picture of Hollywood A-lister Nic Cage in all of his bug-eyed glory. She realized her mistake too late, and decided to turn it into a moment of self-deprecating levity by posting the error on her Tumblr.

Needless to say the hiring manager likely thought she was pulling some sort of prank, so Hojda didn’t get the job. But making the entire Internet smile has to count for something, right?

The "Genious" Alien Whisperer

Quick note to jobseekers – if you’re going to talk about how intelligent you are make sure you spell everything correctly.

This self-acclaimed “professional genious” said his job duties consist of “hanging out with friends, drinking, smoking, and doing tricks such as ollying…” He also brags that he can “answer any question on Jeopordy.” Except, ironically, how to spell the word Jeopardy.

In addition to bragging about doing and selling illegal drugs and offering himself up for execution should the company that hires him fail to make a “100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000” dollar profit, he ends with the unearthly claim that he has extraterrestrial communication experience.

“Do you know aliens from outerspace? NO!!! I didn’t think so because the definition of Alien is Foreign or Undiscovered, but Guess what?? I DO KNOW ALIENS FROM OUTERSPACE!”

Terrifyingly Efficient

Here’s an example of crossing the line from confidence to conceit. And by “crossing the line” we mean pole vaulting over it.

An NYU grad student named Mark lit the Internet ablaze when his amazingly arrogant cover letter to JPMorgan went viral. Instead of focusing on his positive qualities such as being a triple major in Math, Computer Science, and Economics, Mark decided to go the extra mile and detail how he left Villanova because it was “too easy.” He also boasted of being able to lift twice his body weight and do 35 pull-ups. Because that’s essential for working in finance.

Mark learned a year’s worth of Java in 27 days. Mark tested out of seemingly every college course. And Mark performs basic functions of the job with “terrifying efficiency.” Whatever that’s supposed to mean. But after a long letter filled with not-so-humble brags, Mark saved the best for last.

“Please realize that I am not a braggart or conceited, I just want to outline my usefulness. Egos can be a huge liability, and I try not to have one.”

Riiiiiiight...

Impossible is Nothing

The story of Aleksey Vayner is tragic on many levels.

In 2006 Vayner was a Yale senior seeking employment. And apparently he thought the best way to land an investment banker job was to send an 11-page resume to UBS complete with glamour shots and a video resume that included Vayner lifting weights, ballroom dancing, and breaking bricks with his karate skills.

It was quickly passed around the ranks of financial powerhouses and Vayner became the butt of many jokes in the industry. What wasn’t funny was Vayner’s alleged suicide a few years later, making this the cautionary tale to end all jobseeker cautionary tales.



Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Making the Move From the Parental Trenches to the Salt Mines? Check These Jobs Out! (Salary.com)


 

Maybe your kids are back in school and you're itching to take on a part-time job. Or perhaps the dismal economy has forced your hand and you need something full- or part-time to make ends meet. Whatever the case, figuring out which job to take is often the first and most daunting hurdle.
Education, skills and background obviously play a part in what job you can get. Although everyone wants to be paid well, parents also place an added importance on things like flexible work hours, the ability to work from home and jobs that allow for a sustainable work-life balance.

Here are 11 jobs we've researched that may fit the bill.

School Bus Driver

Average Annual Salary: $31,413
Education: Requires high school diploma, valid driver's license

Maybe you've already been driving your kids to school or organizing the carpool for years. Why not get paid for it?

This job allows parents to work in the morning, get a break in the middle of the day, and go back to work in the afternoon. You still get to be around kids (maybe even your own if you're lucky) and collect a paycheck. While you likely don't need a college degree, you will have to have a clean driving record, receive some training and get your Commercial Driver's License.

Web Writer

Average Annual Salary: $47,847
Education: May require bachelor's degree

If you're looking for a job that harnesses your creativity, revolves around interesting topics and allows maximum freedom and flexibility, consider becoming a web writer.

This job can take on many forms. Find an industry in which you have an interest and experience, and then see if any companies need someone to provide content. You'll have to adhere to industry standards and strive to always meet company guidelines regarding your content..

Or you could do what many parents have done in the last few years and become a blogger. Find a subject about which you're passionate and market it to the point you can sell advertising. Not everyone can be a Dooce or Bloggess, but the opportunity is there.

  

Marketing Assistant

Average Annual Salary: $37,945
Education: Likely requires bachelor's degree

Most active parents have volunteered to spearhead an event or fund raiser for their kids' sports team, theater group or school. If you're shaking your head yes, then you already have some marketing experience.

This job requires superior project management skills, the ability to communicate effectively and exemplary attention to detail. Whether you're coordinating an event for a customer or helping advertising with a direct mailing, this job can be a perfect fit for parents who have been driving results for years without getting paid for it.

After you've successfully run the concession stand at athletic events, led the cookie drive to its most profitable year ever and made sure the science fair went off without a hitch, life in the corporate world will be a breeze.

Call Center Representative

Average Annual Salary: $28,686
Education: May require associate's/bachelor's degree

Granted, becoming a call center representative isn't the most glamorous career in the world.

You'll be dealing with a variety of customers and either troubleshooting their problems or trying to sell them one or more of your company's products. Handling complaints and processing forms can get tedious and no one likes to be screamed at by angry customers for hours on end.

But there's a good chance you'll be able to work from home which, for a parent, can be worth its weight in gold. Also, depending on your specific duties, there are plenty of opportunities for a "people person" to help customers and resolve major problems
 
Translator/Interpreter

Average Annual Salary: $43,814
Education: Likely requires bachelor's degree

Most jobs require above average communication skills, but if you're fluent in multiple languages you can get paid simply for making the communication possible.

Most translators are self-employed and work on a variety of different projects. Some institutions need literary works or documents translated from one language to another. Other businesses such as police departments and courts require an interpreter who can make sure people have vital information conveyed to them correctly in real time.

Regardless of which direction you head in this field, you will likely make your own hours and retain optimal flexibility that is so important when you have children

Personal Trainer

Average Annual Salary: $52,997
Education: May require bachelor's degree

Many parents leave the workforce for a time, but some never stop hitting the gym. Maybe it's time to turn all of that extra effort into a living.

Despite having kids and a hectic schedule, you've managed to keep yourself in great shape. Now you can customize one-on-one or group programs to help other people accomplish the same thing. Develop weight training, cardio and nutrition programs either on your own as a self-employed trainer or as an employee of a fitness center.

Whether working for a gym or yourself, there are countless courses and certifications you can take as a trainer that will increase your chances of making more money.
 


Hairdresser/Hairstylist

Average Annual Salary: $23,668
Education: Requires high school diploma

Many parents are de facto hairdressers for the first few years of their kids' lives. But if your child's hair is the envy of the neighborhood and other parents start coming to your house for impromptu haircuts, maybe it's time to go pro.

Although you likely have to take a few courses and you're on your feet all day, popular stylists are usually able to set their own schedules. And if you enjoy talking to people, hair salons are often the hub of the gossip universe.

So if you have the desire and you're a "people person," becoming a hairdresser---even part-time---could mean good money and vital networking

Teacher Aide

Average Annual Salary: $20,026
Education: May require bachelor's degree

If parents are truly interested in ensuring a good education for their kids, then becoming a teacher aide is the perfect way to make that happen.

Chances are you've already spent some time volunteering in the classroom. But as a teacher aide, you can assist the classroom teacher with implementing the curriculum on a daily basis. You'll get to work with students one-on-one and in groups and help the teacher plan lessons and prepare the classroom.

The best part is you work while your kids are in school, meaning you can be there when they get home.
 


Web Designer

Average Annual Salary: $62,839
Education: Likely requires bachelor's degree

Almost everyone is on the Internet these days, and parents often volunteer to create and run websites for their kids' various activities. If you're good enough at it, why not make it a career?

If you've got the skills, this job allows you meet with clients and create a website that meets their needs. You craft the look and feel of the site and ensure the graphic design dovetails with what the site is trying to accomplish, as well as provide the level of functionality specified by the client.

Although skills such as Dreamweaver and HTML are certainly required, you can teach yourself many of the necessary programs. Self-employed web designers often set their own hours and work from home as well

Dietitian

Average Annual Salary: $53,128
Education: Requires a bachelor's degree, may require a master's degree

You've been preaching the importance of vegetables and eagle-eying what your kids eat since they were born. Now you can do the same for clients and collect a paycheck.

Whether working in a clinical, educational or institutional environment, dietitians are generally responsible for creating specialized diets for patients based on their specific needs. Prisons, schools and hospitals rely on dietitians to create menus that adhere to proper dietary restrictions, but many dietitians also work as consultants for various groups and organizations.

It takes some training and you have to have the right education credentials. But with obesity rates on the rise, this is a profession that will need qualified candidates for years to come.

 
Event Planner

Average Annual Salary: $55,299
Education: Likely requires a bachelor's degree

Ever hosted a childrens' birthday party? Booking the restaurant, planning the menu, putting together the gift bags and making sure the entertainment shows up is no easy task. But if you're the type of person who excels in a fast-paced, detail-oriented atmosphere, then event planning could be the career for you.

Just as it is with parenting, you'll have to coordinate everything seamlessly and be able to think on your feet to make sure any problems that do arise are taken care of quickly. If you're a born networker who can maintain multiple relationships with vendors and routinely pull off gatherings without a hitch, this is a great job for you.


Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Things You Absolutely Need to Do Before a Job Interview (Salary.com)

 

Do Your Prep Work

The cover letter has worked. The resume has piqued interest. You get the call you’ve been hoping for and the company wants you to come in for an interview.

This is where the rubber meets the road.

Getting ready for the interview isn’t all about getting primped and pressed, although that’s important. You want to make a good first impression, but it’s that research you do ahead of time that will keep the questions flowing, build a rapport, and ultimately give you the best chance to land the job.

 Do Your Homework

The company you’re about to interview with is going to do their own research on you. What do you know about the company?

You’ll want to show off some of that research in the job interview. Let them know you’re so invested in this company that you’ve taken some time to find out who is in charge, what it is that they do every day and how you can fit in and make a difference. Make sure you’ve checked the company’s web site, annual reports and any other pertinent information like press releases and news stories.

Having some background knowledge through research will serve you well. You don’t want to come across as cocky, but to make a good impression, confidence is key. It’s the research you do ahead of time that will give you the type of knowledge to help you stand tall.

 

Harness the Power of the Internet

Let Google be your guide.

If you’re walking into an interview and the company was just featured in a newspaper or on a web site, you’ll want to know about it. You can also find a wealth of information on social media. Maybe the company has a Facebook page or key executives have a Twitter feed or are on LinkedIn. It’s worth spending some time in front of your computer poking around.

Rest assured, they’re Googling you and checking out your social media. So be smart about what you post, especially leading up to the interview. Don’t be the job candidate who boasts on Facebook about how you're going to order the most expensive steak on the menu because the company is flying you into town for the job interview.

Investigate the Company Culture

Delve into the company culture. Find out what it is that makes the company either a place where people want to work or drives employees away.

Maybe you have a friend who has worked for the company in the past? Or maybe there’s a friend of a friend, or someone on LinkedIn, who wouldn’t mind giving you some insider information on your potential employer.

The work you do ahead of time will also provide fodder for both asking and answering questions that show you are fully engaged.
 

Know Every Bit of Your Resume

Make sure you know your resume inside and out. That’s the document your interviewer is going to use to ask you questions. Study it as if you’re cramming for a final exam where an A is a must.

And be prepared to answer pointed questions about it.

Why did you leave that job after just six months? How come you never finished that graduate degree? What were your job responsibilities at that job five years ago? How will those courses you took translate into helping the company?

Practice Your Interview

Sit down and rehearse your answers to key questions before you do the interview. Think about questions you’ve been asked in the past that have stumped you under the hot lights and pressure of sitting across a conference room table.

Know what you’re going to say when the interviewer asks: Who is your favorite author or what’s the last book you read? Know what you’re going to say if the interviewer asks where you see yourself in five or ten years. And if there’s an answer you’re hoping they don’t ask, have an answer for it at the ready. Because you know it’s coming.

Long pauses or evasive answers will hurt your credibility. Be ready with personal anecdotes and information that can help solidify your answers to questions. By practicing ahead of time, you’ll come across as polished, relaxed and poised under pressure.

 

Prepare Questions of Your Own

An interview isn’t all about what you’ll be asked, but is also a chance for you to get answers. Prepare a list of questions in advance that you want answered to help make an informed decision.

But be leery of jumping too quickly into questions about salary and benefits -- save those for when things get serious. They’re important questions but may turn off the interviewer if that’s where you start.

Ask about expectations and how your performance in meeting those expectations will be evaluated. Take some time to get know about your direct supervisor and the people you will work with, digging into the workplace environment. And, most importantly, let them know you’re still interested by asking what are the next steps and when you should expect to hear from them.

Shop Til You Pop

You want to make a good first impression, so what you wear to the interview could be as important as what you say or do.

First of all, nothing too flashy or too revealing. Let them know this job is important to you by wearing something that’s fresh and stylish. And make sure it fits. There would be nothing worse than getting up on the morning of the interview, taking your shower and then realizing your clothes are too tight or baggy.

Oh, and just before you’re called into the office, make sure you take a minute to look in the mirror – not because you’re vain, but to make sure there is no 





Thursday, September 17, 2015

5 Ways to Demonstrate Value During Job Interviews (Salary.com)

Set Yourself Apart by Showcasing Your Value

 
  
Demonstrating value for employers is a way to set yourself apart from the competition even before you land the job. The value for you is that such a distinctive approach is likely to accelerate your successful hire! An effective strategy for showing your value is to develop a plan to identify and solve problems for the company, using tact in case the person who created the gaffe is also the hiring manager!


Research the Company

To accelerate your job search using this approach, you must target a specific company of interest. If you attempt to concentrate on a number of companies simultaneously, your efforts will be diluted and less likely to produce the results you desire. Focus your research on challenges the company is currently facing or analysis of products and publications. Match the area of analysis with your strengths and skill set so that you can highlight your value for the company.

Identify Problems

 
Your research will create the framework for your plan by identifying gaps or gaffes in the company’s current operations. Gaffes are more likely to be found in branding or publications. If you are a proofreader or marketing specialist, you can distinguish yourself by identifying confusing marketing messages or typos in corporate publications. Gaps can be identified across a number of areas, including inefficient operations, slow sales, or ways that money is being left on the table, for example.

Create an Effective Plan

 
Here is where your talents shine! Create a stellar step-by-step plan for improvement using your strong skill set and unique perspective. Explain your rationale and implementation so the employer gets a clear sense of how you created the plan from start to finish. Your initiative is only one of the strengths on display in your plan.
Examples of plans you might offer include:
  • a marketing plan to expand into an entirely new market with an existing product line
  • strategies to increase productivity
  • creating an employee communication curriculum
  • cost-cutting manufacturing processes
Make the Right Pitch to the Right Person

Gaining access to the right people can be the challenge in this part of your job search. Return to your earlier research and pull out the names of specific department managers or project leaders. Ideally, you will be able to present your plan to the person with authority to implement the changes. Once you have the right names, package your resume and your plan with a brief cover letter and send it off. If using e-mail to present your plan, be certain to create an intriguing subject line to increase the likelihood that your email will be opened. Take the key aspects of your plan and incorporate these into a concise and eye-catching subject line.
Examples of effective subject lines might include:
  • Penetrate New Markets with Existing Product Lines
  • New Strategies to Accelerate Staff Productivity
  • Better Customer Service with Improved Staff Communication
  • Smart Strategies to Reduce Manufacturing Costs
Another important consideration in e-mail communication is whether attachments will be opened. Some recipients may be concerned about attachments containing viruses or company spam filters may block your email. Include previews of salient points in the body of the email to generate interest and spur the manager to open your attachments.

Always Follow Up

Your contact information will be included in your resume and e-mail signature, but continue your proactive approach by following up. Try following up with a phone call so you can have a real-time conversation with the decision maker. In attempting to get through, be certain to mention the plan you provided and state your intent to clarify any questions and to tailor the plan to the executive’s needs. If unable to get through, request a time to return the call or schedule a call. Your organizational skills will be noticed.

Creating a plan to address employer’s needs before you are even employed sets you miles apart from the competition! Your emphasis on providing value to the employer and making an investment of your time speaks volumes about the value you can provide on the job. Show employers your value to win more interviews and you will soon be getting paid for your skills and expertise!

Recommended Reading

Thank you for reading. As an added bonus, the Salary.com editorial staff has compiled a recommended reading list on this subject. Enjoy:

Job Fairs, Hiring Events...just now




Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Veteran Job Fair : September 18, 2015


Candidate Center - September 2015 - French American Chamber of Commerce

 
Our Employment Service
   
Candidate Center - September 2015

                      
 It will save you time, money and energy in your hiring process.

As a Chamber of Commerce, we receive a large number of job applications throughout the year.   

Every month, we will share with you the applications that will allow us to help you find the right people for the right positions.  

In our process, all the candidates fill out a form online and provide relevant information such as type of visa, type of position desired, field of activity, professional and educational background, etc. Based on these forms, we create a monthly document, assigning a reference number to identify each candidate.  

When you are interested by a candidate, you can send us an email atemploi@faccmiami.com mentioning the reference number
.  
Thus, we will be able to send you the contact and the resume of the candidate.   
  

Review the profiles on our website: 


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